30 years.

"How beautiful you are my darling. How beautiful you are."

The only way I feel like I can actually begin to write these words is to use Holy Spirit inspired words from the Words of God (bible book of Song of Solomon, chapter 4, verse 1). My words can't say it.

Lea and I remembered and celebrated our wedding anniversary yesterday. 30 years.

Gift. All gift. Kindness of God in my life. I can't get over it. I'm not getting over it. I don't want to. I want it to be the guts of wonder and beauty and amazement and favor of God gushing. Please. I want that.

I want the words that our friend and college prof spoke over us in our wedding ceremony. Bible book of Proverbs, chapter 15, verse 15. "A cheerful heart has a continual feast."

Continual. Feast.

Those words speak their own language of heaven.

I receive. And I want more. That is inherent in feasting. And it's pointing.

Quieted by His love.

Intoxicated by her beauty.

Aware of the brokenness in the world and my own chaotic heart.

Longing for Emma as she grows.

Jealous of what Scott now knows.

Angry about the lost lives of George and Ahmaud.

Missing students.

Wondering about Covid and living life.

All of that in this moment.

Capacity.

This, my complex heart in union with her complex heart. On purpose. 30 years and this new day.

"Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another; because love covers a multitude of sins."

I am drenched by fervent love.

Continual Feast.

Thank you.

There's more.