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You conquer.


Saul, on the road to Damascus. As I have savored this story over the last 10 days, actually over my adult life really, I have been aware that I do not have any words that I can possibly add to the gloriously ferocious Word of God found in the bible book of Acts, chapters 7, 8 and 9. These words drip with such a beautiful severity, that literally I want to shut my mouth and scream at the same time. Drink from this transformation story dear heart in these latter days of Lent.

Word of God speak. Please. Please.

When the members of the Sanhedrin heard this, they were furious and gnashed their teeth at him. But Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, looked up to heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. “Look,” he said, “I see heaven open and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God.” At this they covered their ears and, yelling at the top of their voices, they all rushed at him, dragged him out of the city and began to stone him.

Meanwhile, the witnesses laid their coats at the feet of a young man named Saul.

While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” Then he fell on his knees and cried out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he fell asleep.

And Saul was there, giving approval to his death.

Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”

“Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.

“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”

The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.

In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!”

“Yes, Lord,” he answered.

The Lord told him, “Go to the house of Judas on Straight Street and ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying. In a vision he has seen a man named Ananias come and place his hands on him to restore his sight.”

“Lord,” Ananias answered, “I have heard many reports about this man and all the harm he has done to your holy people in Jerusalem. And he has come here with authority from the chief priests to arrest all who call on your name.”

But the Lord said to Ananias, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel. I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”

Then Ananias went to the house and entered it. Placing his hands on Saul, he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” Immediately, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again. He got up and was baptized, and after taking some food, he regained his strength.

Lord, you will conquer me sooner of later. I surrender.

Murderers and persecutors can taste the light of Jesus Christ and want it. And crave it.

Saul isn't going to be a history repeater. God is making him a history maker, a history interruptor for the glory of God.

I am laid low as I encounter these specific words. "This man is my chosen instrument to carry My Name....I will show him how much he must suffer for My name."

I think this is the place where I want to shut my mouth and be quiet. I can't say anything. I don't really want to say anything. It is so holy.

When I think of the beautiful severity of the pursuit of God, I am reminded of these words from Nichole Nordeman. The song title is "Hush. Hush." I sense that she is aware that there are God moments where our mouths just close in surrender. In humility. In fear. In awe. In gratitude that there is pursuit of......me.

"And I am the storm that swallowed you.

I let you bleed. I thought you knew.

And I am the bottom. And I am the floor.

I am the deep you never knew before.

I let you sink and I let you go.

But I caught you in the undertow.

And I am the shore and I am the flame.

And mercy is My name.

Hush. Hush.

Hush now.

There's more.

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